Why Did I?

Why Did I?

     In this world of ours, there are many things that we regret. There are many things we try to forget, and there are many things we all try to change. But I know one thing for sure, what's past, is past. There is only one permanent thing in the world, and that is change. All things change, so always be prepared on what might happen next. As a young teenager, I have suffered through many trials, many challenges, and there are things that I might regret for the rest of my life.

     During my elementary days, I had lots of fun. I didn't care of what my actions would bring me to. I played as if there was no tomorrow, I had fun as if there were no more smiles for me left, and I did not care and did not see the love of the people around me. I was used in being the top of our class, even from nursery, up to grade four. But starting from I think, grade 4, I had these opponents in class, they were twin sisters. So as expected, I was not able to be in the top when I was in grade 5. I accepted it even I knew that I disappointed my parents. 

     In the last days of my grade six in ICS, we had the meeting for the graduation. The honors were announced in our class, and I was shocked that I was only the 3rd honors. I felt that my heart was torned to pieces and I could not accept it because I knew that I gave my best. When the parents were around for the final meeting, my mother really felt bad that her blood pressure got high and she was brought to the hospital. That night, I also went to the hospital where my mother was, and I knew that my mother had a mild stroke. I felt severe sorrow, the first thing that came up my mind was that it was me who caused all of this. If only I had studied more, and focused more on my studies, none of these would have happened. Days have passed, and I can't help not to think about it, I did not have the strength to look at my mother when I was hearing her with my father cry. They both thought of how things would work out now, I felt that my heart was beating so fast.

     After some years have passed by, I try to study harder and show my parents that I will do better. I will make them proud because I don't want to hear them cry anymore. Until now, I still tremble whenever I think about those times. But I believe that there should be no regrets in life, because if you chose that decision, stand up for it. I don't consider these happenings as mistakes, but as lessons in life.